Elephant Muck Up

It appears the GOP has a new sport this week–mud wrestling! As if there is some great difficulty acknowledging the reality of “birthright citizenship,” the herd then tried to sort out appropriate reference terminology for citizens born to non-citizen parents. No great intellect is required, but the rolling in the mud only serves to demonstrate the limited lexicon and mental capacities of the GOP hopefuls.

Lead bull Trumpeter found the mud hole, and kindly invited the loyal herd to hop in and muck about. A confused Jeberwoky asked the media crowd for help because his lexicon had become mud soaked and now unreadable. Walkerpooh and Grahamaya made up “law” for the muck match and Santoryuma seconded the motion while he looks for mud robbers. Jindala and Rubiola, the herd twins, learned they are now outcasts, but they’ll roll around together to keep on Trumpeter’s good side. Huckabeebee keeps squirting more muck into the hole. Fiorinala just wants a big wall around the the mud hole and let the boys bounce off the walls. Carsonido has a drone flying above keeping an eye out for any herd interlopers. The rest of the herd is slogging along to join the muck fest.

Meanwhile the darling little Deez Nutsabubba is asking about joining the herd. Rumor has it that he’s Trumpeter’s offspring from another baby momma. Trumpeter insists on seeing his birth certificate.


  1. Jeberwoky not only got his lexicon all muddy, but it appears his world atlas is unreadable too. While everyone else was mucking around about Mexico, he started pointing his finger west toward Asia.

  2. Christieistie jumped into Trumpeter’s muck hole with his “FedEx barcode reader” to track all immigrants. Will he implant a chip or strap an ankle bracelet on them too?

  3. Huckabeebe borrowed Jeberwoky’s muddy atlas and is facing west now too. Which direction will Huckabeebee’s compass point next?

  4. Walkerpooh jumped back in to the muck fest, but he’s turned north! Yes, he wants a wall at the Canadian border. Waiting for a wall on the east coast now.

  5. Jindala seems to worry about every immigrant being able to recite the Pledge of Allegiance to the United States (in English) before being allowed in. Check your cultural heritage at the border and assimilate (although not entirely sure what).

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